Life... and the tale of the silly midget storeperson...

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Once upon a time, in the mystical swamp of Christchurch, there stood a silly midget store person. The midget store person was short and stout, with a pair of bifocals to accentuate the worldly knowledge of her Whitcoulls store. There she stood in front of the DVD shelves, diligently ruminating over if Southpark should really be in the childrens' section.

Then out of nowhere a customer miraculously appeared in a cloud of smoke, with a DVD in each hand she asked with great puzzlement:

"Is The Polar Express a good movie? Better than A Bugs Life?".
To which the store person replied, "I haven't seen The Polar Express before, but the cover looks good so it shouldn't be bad at all..."

I looked on, in stuttering bewilderment.

"Wow, ok" said the mother, with a plume of uncertainty in every syllable. "I'll get it then...".

Shocked, I stood by. Thoughts of a little boy's Christmas ruined racing through me. Should I barge in? Save the day? Rescue the weak minded from the evil temptations.... no... mind tricks... of the dark side? Christ... its just a DVD, am I going mad?

So she follows the silly midget store person, down the dark thorny path of eventual disappointment. Appearing satisfied with doubt she stands at the checkout. A credit card in her hand pays for the DVD.


And a little boy waits...

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For those who have not seen the The Polar Express - don't. At least save your retinas for something that may blind you but incite some form of laughter and mirth: have a friend shine a laser pointer in your eye, stare into the sun, look closely at Helen Clarke's massive predatory incisors. Whatever it maybe, I assure you life will be better that way.

(Erika, yes... you... put the Polar Express DVD down before you take it to a DVD night.)